well, i'm busy at work and all that.

mhmmm

i put in for a different position at work yesterday.  i don't know if i will get awarded the position but it will be a weekend baylor position.  12 hour shifts every saturday and sunday from 7p to 7a then one day during the week. 

it is a different unit too, so i will have to see what happens.  word is the unit manager for that unit is pretty straight laced (thank goodness, i still have a lot to learn and it will be nice to have someone that i can go to with questions and all that... though not at 3am... but that doesn't mean i can't leave her a note or whatnot.)

i'm going to see the watchmen in about an hour and a half and i'm so stoked.  i paid for my ticket over the phone and stuff, so all i have to do is pick up the ticket when i get there (i'm in fact procrastinating right now, i should be showering and preparing for my journey to the theater)

so i'm stoked about that.

all in all things are looking as if they may be looking up.  i had some huge expenses go out over the past few weeks and i am just glad that i had a small reserve to fall back on.  i no longer have said reserve, but i'm going to start building one up again.  whew!!   it wil feel good to get that taken care of.

oh, and i'll be able to start school soon with the new schedule and all that.

yeah, stoked.

alright then... off to shower and prep.  it will feel weird to wear something that isn't scrubs.  i'll have to dig some jeans out.

~squeee!~

i am such a dork.

video of me slapping it on a respirator or oxygen concentrator at work when i get a chance. (that should be fun!)

"the moon on the water" by kathy phillips

This is subtitled "reflections on an aging parent"

Because I have a love of geriatric care, I've made it a mission of sorts to become more aware of the impact of placement of a loved one in a nursing home on the family unit.  The post below this one really illustrates how I feel at times, though obviously it is one of extremes.  Most times, my heart is breaking for the families dealing with such an insidious disease (that being dementia). 

I'm lucky in that the situation below doesn't often happen.  Many of the families are very active in the day to day lives and activities of the residents on the unit. 

In other news, I've been contemplating the ramifications of sexual expression in the confines of a dementia unit.  Interesting ethical implications really.  I'm going to be doing some research I think, if only to educate myself on the subject.  More on that later, on to the book!

"The Moon on the Water" is an interesting take on elder care from the point of view of the child caregiver.  Tying the Buddhist goddess Kuan Yin to the present day challenges gives the whole book a flavor of a spiritual journey, which in a way the whole experience of caring for an aging parent can be. 

All too often I think that those of us in the healthcare field become obsessed with the minutia of medication administration, documentation, and treatment protocols, while allowing the _person_ we are caring for to become nothing more than a selection of comorbidities, complaints and constipation.  It is refreshing to see things from the opposite side of the coin from time to time, to remind myself that beyond "meds need to be given in ten minutes", a few moments listening to someone talk about their daughter, or the emotional support I can provide to someone working through fear and confusion can be just as important.


All in all, a well written book (so far, I'm only halfway through) and the illustrations (both historical and those of the author's own pen) are wonderful.







In other news, little dude got caught passing a note in class that said (I'm quoting directly from the email from his teacher here)  "you suk mukey nuts dumbo".  Apparently the kid he was passing it to has been bugging the little dude.  ~sighs~  I talked with the little dude about it, and he seemed pretty remorseful, though I am getting the feeling that this is not the last time I will be hearing things like this (though I hope this takes care of THIS issue).  His teacher is great, and is very supportive, and has no qualms about keeping me in the loop with regards to his progress and behavior.  Now I'm not one of those parents who thinks that their child is a "precious little snowflake", so perhaps that has something to do with it. 

Though perhaps I should let him know that the proper term is not "nuts"  but "testicles".

~grins~

... please do not lie to your elderly loved one and tell them that they are just entering the nursing home for "rehab"  when you have no intention of ever taking them back in with you...ever.  even if they become nimble and spry enough to join the u.s. gymnastics team.

thanks and love,

the nurse who doesn't want to get stuck in the middle of your drama.

the little dude is at his dad's for the weekend.

last night, i snuggled in bed and started a movie via netflix, "untraceable".

premise of the movie is that an internet site, www.killwithme.com , is all about um... killing people, the speed of which said person is scratched depended on hits to the site.

interesting little site (above) to tie into the movie.

it seems that the pattern i'm following is such.

1. climb into bed, laptop on its little rolling table snugged up next to the bed.
2. select movie from netflix.
3. begin movie after setting alarm and snuggling under covers.
4. fall asleep within the first 20 minutes of movie.
5. wake up with the alarm, blank screen casting a glow across the room.
6. become disappointed that i missed yet another movie.
7. never try to watch it again.

this pattern was repeated yet again last night.

in other news, working weekends takes a lot of getting used to all over again.

worked today, and my counterpart was sick, but came in, and spent the shift with a mask over his lower face while he provided patient care.  i felt bad for him, and hope he gets better soon.  he didn't slack though, so that's good.

came home today, positively wiped.  on the way home i hobbled into the dollar store for some more conditioner and toilet paper.  normally i would do things like troll the book selection, see what type of stuff they have in the bargain bin, and peep out the office supplies.  not today, because after being on my feet all day, then driving to the store, i was walking like some of the residents i care for.  so stiff! 

then a salad after i showered, and i popped in some MST3K.  i went ahead and set my alarms for the morning, even though it was only 5pm, because i didn't want to miss work if i should doze off.

woke up again at 8:45, and flipped out!  i wake out of a dead sleep, sweaty and disoriented, and look at my clock, then go "oh, crap!"  then "how come no one called me?!" ... all because i didn't realize right off that it was 8:45 PM, not AM.  i was sure that i was late for work.

so i get out of bed like a banshee, and the only thing that brought me back to reality was the fact that my tendonitis wasn't so bad.  usually i'm almost crippled in the morning, until i can stretch my legs.

another glance at the clock confirmed it.  i was fine.

but once again, i slept through a movie.

ugh.

oh yeah, and wearing red to work on valentines day does not a happier person make.

i stopped dead in my tracks in the middle of the unit today, because all of a sudden, due to a cosmic ray of awesome, the call lights somehow synchronized long enough to beep and bloop out the opening to "under pressure" by queen.

"bum bum bum ba da bum bum!"

i had to do a quick shuffle, while everyone stared at me, and the rest of the day FLEW by, with freddie singing in my head, a dopey grin on my face...


another one of the nursing students hired to work as aides passed her NCLEX. good for her! she had the same symptoms we all did while waiting for results of our test, anxiety, a sense of doom, n/v, h/a, paranoia. ~grins~

i have to wonder, on a somewhat unrelated note, how long the budget can keep stretching to afford all the nurse graduates working as stnas until they pass boards? look at it like this, stnas get paid a truly insulting wage for the work that they do. truly. conversely, graduate nurses get paid their future starting wage while they wait to take their NCLEX. so you are paying someone almost double for the same work. and if they elect to stay at the facility after they pass, they continue to make their nurse's pay until a position opens up. now, i'm not complaining at all, believe me, this little arrangement they have going on is what allowed me to be independent much earlier than would have otherwise been the case, i just wonder what the budget looks like.

i know, i know, not my place, yo.

on the flip side, one wonders why they have so many stna positions open for graduate nurses to fill... ~shakes her head~

but eh, you can't really get into it too deeply with freddie singing in the background!




YEAH!

okay, this is awesome.

a book "voluntary madness" by norah vincent

came across a quote that really resonated with me, with regards to the lack of privacy at work (this is an issue i have... erm... issues with i suppose)

"...the room or partial room you occupy, if it is clean and quiet, and you are left to yourself when you want to be, if you can shut the door and turn off the light, or turn it on if that is your preference, if you can exist in this place in a suspended state, separate from the stressors of your life, alone, but knowing that just outside the door there are people who will talk to you, or play cards with you, or help you if you are shaking -- if all of this is true, then that room becomes a type of sanctuary.  in it you can get a version of what people get on religious or spiritual retreats, what fleeing emigrants of catastrphohe and danger despirately seek.  asylum"

if i were to be a resident in a facility such as the one i work at, i would feel very keenly the lack of privacy.  doors always open, people walking back and forth through the halls at all hours of the day and night, popping in whenever the mood struck them.  it would bother me.  and then of course i would be looked at as antisocial, and rude, and possibly mentally ill for wanting the privacy a closed door, or even a closed curtain could provide.

i ALWAYS knock on the door ( erm, or frame) even if the resident whom i am getting ready to look in on is in a persistent vegetative state.  because i would hate for someone to just barge in and add their presence to the one small (and it IS small) area of existence that i can hold on to.  

at the end of it all though, i will probably be the one, bedridden, headphones slipped over my ears by a harried aide at my request, watching a movie on my laptop, an oversized, arthritis friendly mouse clutched in one clawlike hand as i surf from clip to clip on youtube.

pull the curtain please on your way out.

state is in the building. 

~cringes~

i've been reviewing drug classifications, medication administration rules, and treatment protocols, because i don't want to be the one to fark something up.

though more than likely, being the newest nurse on the beat, i will be.

~stiff upper lip~

only three and a half more days to go.

the house!

http://fizzlebot.com/sinthai/thehouse.htm

need i say more?